The container it came in was simple and sleek; there wasn't any annoying packaging going on and there was a simple insert behind the toy that had the name on the front and some information on the back;
If you can't read it, the three round icons to the side say "silicone", "phthalates free" and "harness compatible".
Once I got pictures I cracked that sucker open and grabbed it and gave it the 'squeeze' test...
...
It failed. Yes, the texture on it is extremely realistic, as is the design in general; it looks like a penis, the balls are 3-D, but the hardness? The hardness is like squeezing a softball, and that's not how a dick should feel, especially if you're packing in a place where you're going to get your junk grabbed. It doesn't feel realistic from an outside standpoint, though it might look it from a distance ( which I'll get to in a second ).
Now, the looks are fine. Mostly. I really enjoy the balls on this; they're 3-d instead of flat-backed which really gives it an extra realistic edge. The shaft itself is nice as well - it's circumcised however, so if you're looking for a packer that's not, this won't be your gig - and the glans has a distinctive ridge that's pretty noticeable if you're just wearing underwear. The skin texturing is grandiose too; I've got no complaints about it. Highly detailed, very nice.
There are a few problems with it, though.
Like the bubbles close to the head and at the base of the cock/on the balls that look like weird... warts. I know that Goodvibes designed this product themselves, so I'm guessing this might be a problem with inexperienced pouring of silicone or mold problems? But I've got to say that having bubbles on their packer gives the potential to be very upsetting. I personally don't mind very much ( though I'm worried they're gonna tear somehow ), and I'm going to hope that this is just a slightly defective pecker that I've got.
Other than that.... the fucking hardness. That and the bubbles are the only two things that keep this from being a great packer! If it wasn't for the hardness you could probably use this as an insertable cock as well, but as it is, you can hardly bend the shaft away from the balls, much less keep it like that with any modicum of comfort for penetration that isn't oral ( and even that's iffy ).
I tried it vaginally and the stiffness the material presented just wasn't hip and happenin' ( made it very awkward to insert and almost impossible to thrust with ), so I had to give up. I'm pretty sure that the bubbles would make it hard to fully sterilize too, but I'm not 100% sure about that.
Now, for the thing you've probably been waiting for... the packing!
I almost think it looks like I have half-a-stiffy, but then again, it could just be me. You can also totally see the glans ridge through these briefs and I'm okay with it. When I'm wearing just pants it looks... well, like I've got a cock. Not too noticeable, but enough to make me feel like I actually look the part of a man.
When I'm wearing this packer, the back of it sits pretty nice against my body - for awhile. But then it all comes back to the hardness. That damn hardness. I wouldn't harp on it so much except that it effects TONS of things about this packer... sooo, I gotta mention it. The longer you wear this packer, the more you'll become aware that it digs into your legs when you sit - or pretty much the whole area. This makes it okay for short-term use, but if you expect to be walking around or doing anything with Private for a long period of time... you're gonna be uncomfortable.
The color is also relatively close to my skin-tone, but it's not gonna be like that for everyone; it's a single-color silicone. Pretty much a generic 'white' sort of thing going on. It comes in 3 colors - vanilla ( which is what I got ), caramel and chocolate. The names make me REALLY HUNGRY.
The material itself is 100% sterilizable which is really swaggin'. It's silicone, which means you can toss it in a pot and boil it, stuff it in the top rack of a dishwasher without soap for a cycle, soap-and-water it, pretty much anything you want to clean it.
You shouldn't go and use silicone- or oil-based lubes with this, though. They'll eat away at the material and it will be less-than-usable after that, so stick to water-based lubricants. You're also gonna want to be safe with how you store this toy; don't go storing it with other materials unless you know that they're also silicone- but even then, it's still advisable to use a toy-bag to keep it completely safe so the material won't melt.
In total, I'm giving this a 3 out of 5 stars. The product is GREAT - it's just those two things that knocked the two stars off it. If they improve their hardness and pouring methods in the future and re-release this, then I assure all my readers, this will get a 5/5. Til then, though... 3/5.
FTC Statement: Private Packer was provided to AbsoluteDebauchery for free by Good Vibrations Sex Toys in exchange for a review. This has not affected the opinions within the review and complies with FTC standards.
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